We all network all the time, whether it’s at the coffee machine, mother and toddler groups, the school gate, at parties or with friends and family.

However, we usually only give it a grand title when we are trying to lever it to get business, so mention Networking with a capital N, and people get anxious and think it’s some sort of dark art that you need a degree in. It’s not.

Networking is just connecting with people who hopefully will like you and find what you have to offer useful to themselves or to people they know. As it’s often through referrals that you get business you can see immediately why networking is all about building relationships, which is something women are naturally good at! So no need to be scared, this is something you’ve been doing since pre-school. However, there are a few tips that can make the difference between an OK event and truly successful one, so here goes.

1. Be Selective
You’ll have the opportunity to attend many networking events, so you need to be quite selective else you’ll do more networking than work! It makes sense to check out the attendees list beforehand, which is easier if the event is listed online, such as on Ecademy or Facebook.

2. Be Prepared
Your going to get asked 'What do you do?’ by at least a dozen people in a very short space of time, so it makes sense to have a 'strapline' answer prepared and practiced so it just trips off your tongue without leaving you looking like a stranded goldfish! Make sure it's short, snappy and memorable. If you wear lots of ‘hats’, which let's face it is pretty much the norm for WAH and business mums, then focus on the one that is the best ‘fit’ for this event – you can always mention the others in conversation later.

3. Be Early
Aim to arrive early – it‘s much easier to introduce yourself when there’s just a few people there, and gives you the advantage if you are already there to 'welcome' incomers with a smile - then it'll be you asking "What do you do?" as the opening gambit - much less daunting! Make a point of asking the organisers if they will introduce you to people as they arrive - if you feel awkward about doing so, just remember it’s in their interest to help you because they want their event to go well.

3. Be Connected
Relax, be yourself, and don’t make assumptions about the people you meet, either good or bad. People are just that. People. Try and speak to as many people as you reasonably can, and don’t attach yourself like glue to the first person you talk to – they are here to network, not babysit you - and don’t be a wallflower, otherwise there is no point in coming, you might have just as well have stayed on the sofa!

4. Be Aware
It's easy to get carried away and talk up a storm out of sheer nervousness - or relief of having someone to talk to (working at home can be isolating!), so just be aware of what you're saying and ask lots of open questions (ie they need more than a yes or no) and listen carefully. Don’t get on your soapbox. Trust me, no one wants to hear your take on what’s wrong with the world today or how you can’t handle your children.

5. Be Interested
Firstly everyone likes someone who is interested in them, and secondly it gives you chance to listen for the connections they have with who you are and what you do.

Slow down and match your tone of voice to that of the person you are speaking to - without being daft about it, of course! In coaching we call this mirroring, and it helps relax people.


6. Be Involved
Bored is boring, so if there is anything with audience participation, as there often is when there is a speaker, then throw yourself into it. Why? You’ll be admired for taking part, it will foster a team spirit with your event mates, and people will be much more friendly to you.


7. Be Helpful
The cardinal sin at Networking events is the hard sell, so don’t thrust your business card into the hand of the person you are talking to – if they are interested, they will ask. If you are interested, you will ask. That’s how it works.

Concentrate instead on finding things you can give your new contacts, such as information and more contacts. Thinking this way will relax you and make you much less scary than a hard seller, plus it also provides a reason for follow-up and staying in contact.


8. Be Happy
Happiness is attractive; misery is not, and if you can’t find that natural inner joy at the moment, then go something about it NOW before you attempt to network. Once you're smiling, don't go over the top - being big headed and pompous is as much a turn off as being too timid or anxious. People just don’t like having to work too hard. You don’t like having to work hard. Give everyone a break and relax.


9. Be a Good Friend
If people like you and what you do, they could make lots of recommendations on your behalf. And if you like them, you will return the favour, which will create more good feeling and referrals. Otherwise known as being a good friend.


10. Be a Journalist
You are going to meet lots of different people in a short space of time, so to jog your memory later it pays to be a journalist for a moment and make notes about a person on the back of their business card. It helps if they have something about them you can remember, which is where girls often score over boys because we don't have to wear boring suits - make sure you are wearing something memorable, even if it is just a lovely brooch or scarf, because you won't be the only one playing journalist!


11. Reconnect
Always follow up with people you have met and exchanged cards with. When you get home, review your notes on their business cards and add the contacts to your database. Note where you offered help or assistance, and follow up on it. Send everyone you met a personalised ‘nice to meet you’ email.

12. Be Generous
Aim never to give less than you receive. Abundance follows abundance.



© Claire Burdett. No content to be reproduced without written approval of the author.

Claire Burdett is the Founder and Director of Funky Angel. She is a Writer, Journalist, and Editor, Integrated Marketing Expert, and Home Business Mentor.

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